Compulsive cheating disorder is a term used to describe individuals who engage in repeated infidelity.
These behaviours may stem from underlying issues like sex and porn addiction, personality disorders like narcissism, histrionic personality disorder, antisocial personality disorder, and borderline personality disorder, or substance use problems. Regardless of the cause, chronic cheating can have a devastating impact on romantic relationships.
Signs of a serial cheater
If you notice any of these then you may be a serial cheater or you are in a relationship with one.
1. Fear of abandonment
Many compulsive cheaters fear loneliness and abandonment. This fear can lead them to seek external validation from many people. They crave constant reassurance of being desirable and loved. Some may even keep "backup options" in case their relationship fails.
2. Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)
To compulsive cheaters, the grass is always green on the other side. They often wonder about what sex with other people will be like. They may experience heightened FOMO regarding sex, dating, and relationships.
3. Fantasy driven
Compulsive cheaters often get caught up in the idea of a relationship and not the relationship itself. They may enjoy the chase over genuine connection. Once a relationship becomes real, with all the complexities that come with it, they may lose interest.
4. Impulsive behavior
Compulsive cheating can be linked to impulsivity. The desire for immediate gratification can cloud judgement, leading to actions without considering the consequences.
5. Overt flirtatiousness
A compulsive cheater might appear charming and overly friendly with others. Flirting is a way to gain attention, see if the person they are flirting with likes them, and explore potential sexual opportunities.
6. Shallow remorse
When caught cheating, they offer insincere apologies and are laced with blame. Statements like "I'm sorry, but you don’t give me enough attention" shift the responsibility and can leave the betrayed partner feeling like it’s their fault and they need to apologise.
7. Broken Promises
Compulsive cheaters may make grand pronouncements about changing their behaviour. They make vows of fidelity, and attempts to appear dedicated may seem genuine, but ultimately, their promises are repeatedly broken. This pattern can extend beyond cheating and become a hallmark of the entire relationship.