Women are more frequently targeted because men make up the majority of scammers.
Being a woman doesn't just make you more vulnerable; everyone is also at risk of being scammed. However, loneliness and a desire for connection make romance scams on women common.
Furthermore, a significant number of people who fall victim to scams choose not to come forward due to the overwhelming sense of shame they feel. This is particularly true for men, who are often less inclined to report cases of romance fraud.
How romance scams work:
1. It begins with trust
Most of these scams happen online, or at least begin online. The scammer establishes a close relationship with his victim based on trust and love.
2. You love attention and admiration and he feeds on it
Even intelligent people tend to start feeling strongly for new admirers. Regular contact naturally strengthens relationships, and the attention is flattering.
When you first meet a fraudster online, he will love bomb you and shower you with so much love and affection. He would act like the ideal man, say all the right things, take you out on dates, and maybe even buy you expensive gifts. It’s all a ruse to make you trusting of him and to make you believe he loves you.
3. He catfishes you on a dating site
It's so much easier to lie and build a false persona online. Online scammers target dating sites, where they may communicate through instant messaging. Beware, as they may deceive you with fabricated images and videos.
4. It starts from simple favours
After a close relationship has been formed, and there is trust, the con artist starts requesting favours from the victim. It could be as easy as providing them with a phone to enhance their communication or taking actions that allow both of them to remain together, such as covering the costs of their airline tickets.
5. He tells a touching story
He tells a story that's so compelling you have to prove your love for him. Sometimes, con artists will introduce a third party to aid in the fraud. He might provide you with his debtor's contact number (a debt he incurred through no fault of his own but while doing business), and the debtor could send intimidating messages that would raise concerns about your partner's well-being and compel you to send money.
Why is it so easy to fall for romance scams?
Romantic ideals
Studies reveal that people who idealize their partners are more vulnerable to fraud. Some women tend to idealize their romantic partners. Romance novels, K-Drama, and romantic movies have the power to awaken a deep longing for ideal love within women, and these men skillfully tap into their fantasies.
For example, the Tinder Swindler deceived women by presenting them with a fabricated life of wealth and luxury. However, sometimes all he has to do is overwhelm them with love and attention. Their brains will believe that he is true and that he loves them.
Loneliness
Loneliness is common these days and can make people go to extraordinary lengths to keep their lovers. Some internet users prefer expressing themselves online to doing so in person. So they use dating websites to meet people and prefer text and video calls to physical meetings. They can fall in love with someone merely by talking to them constantly on the phone because they are so lonely.
How to avoid romance scams
- Use Google Images to perform a reverse image search on their images to determine whether they are using stolen images to fabricate a persona.
- Additionally, you want to conduct as much social media due diligence and background checks as possible. You can do so by checking Google and all their social media. If they have no social media presence, that’s a red flag.
- Finally, do not send money to someone you just met or are dating, no matter the emergency, or promise of repayment.