7 signs you're the toxic one in the relationship

But if we're being honest, it’s not always easy to recognise when we are the ones contributing negatively to our relationships.

Here are some signs that might suggest you are the toxic one in your relationship.

1. You’re always criticising

One of the biggest signs of toxicity is if you have a tendency to always criticise rather than constructively communicate. If you are fond of picking on your lover’s flaws, and pointing out their shortcomings more than you show appreciation, it can damage their self-esteem and create a negative environment. Frequent criticism can make your partner feel they’re never enough, which can damage trust and affection over time.

2. You avoid taking responsibility

Another key sign of toxic behaviour is deflecting blame. If you often dodge accountability, blame your partner for issues, or refuse to apologise when you’re wrong, it shows a lack of self-awareness and humility. This can lead to a cycle of unresolved issues and can make your partner feel unheard and undervalued.

3. You’re overly dependent on your partner for happiness

Another sign you might be the toxic one in your relationship is that you rely solely on your partner for emotional stability and happiness. If you don’t have your interests, friends, or hobbies outside of the relationship, it can lead to clinginess or resentment. Over-dependence can make your partner feel trapped and might cause them to withdraw emotionally.

4. You don’t respect boundaries

Everyone needs personal space, even in close relationships. Habits such as constantly invading your partner’s personal space, time, or privacy, can lead to feelings of suffocation. This might include reading their messages, dropping by unannounced, or dismissing their need for alone time all of which falls into the toxic category.

5. You engage in passive-aggressive behaviour

Passive-aggressiveness – like giving silent treatment, making sarcastic comments, or withholding affection – is also a toxic trait. This behaviour creates confusion and resentment, as it prevents open, direct communication and leaves issues unresolved.

6. You're always creating drama

If you find yourself always starting arguments over small issues, creating unnecessary conflict, or making dramatic statements to get attention, then you are most likely the toxic one in the relationship. Things like these create a tense atmosphere and can make your partner feel emotionally exhausted.

7. You withhold affection as punishment

Another sign of toxicity is withholding affection – like hugs, intimacy, or words of love – as a way to punish your partner. This is a form of emotional manipulation and can make your partner feel insecure and can drive a wedge between you two.

If you have noticed any of the above signs, it is best to start working on yourself so your relationship can be healthier.