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'I think my mother hates me' - Here's what to do when you feel this way

Opening channels of communication, extending a helping hand, and seeking counseling are among the actions you can take if you feel that your mother harbours negative feelings towards you.
A sad youth
A sad youth

Growing up, we've all heard the saying, 'mother's love is unconditional'. But what if your reality feels starkly different?

What if every interaction with your mother feels like a tug of war, each word exchanged like a dagger to the heart? What if you're trapped in a whirlpool of emotions, thinking, 'my mother hates me'?

For some, this sentiment isn't just a fleeting thought but a consistent feeling. The weight of such a belief can be devastating, leading to feelings of isolation, self-doubt, and intense pain.

READ: 7 steps to manage life stress in a healthy way

It can make one question their self-worth and their place in the world.

Understanding such feelings is complicated. Sometimes, generational differences, unspoken traumas, or personal struggles can create an emotional rift between a parent and a child.

It's also possible that your mother might be battling her internal demons, unknowingly projecting her pain and frustration onto you.

What can you do?

1. Open the channels of communication

While it's daunting, initiate a calm and non-confrontational conversation. Express your feelings without accusing. Remember, understanding begins with listening.

2. Seek counseling

A professional therapist or counselor can provide an unbiased perspective and guide you through the labyrinth of your emotions.

3. Self-care

Surround yourself with positive influences. Friends, hobbies, and personal passions can provide solace during turbulent times.

4. Extend a helping hand, anonymously

Sometimes, the root of the problem isn't visible on the surface. If you believe your mother might be struggling with her mental or emotional well-being, consider seeking help for her.

She will never know that it's you who reached out for her, eliminating any fear of further friction or misunderstandings. It's a quiet way of saying, "I care, and I want to help."

The emotional journey of feeling unloved, especially by someone as pivotal as a mother, is unimaginably painful.

But remember, life has a way of healing and mending broken ties. Take steps, both for your well-being and hers. Sometimes, the darkest nights lead to the brightest dawns.

Through understanding, communication, and care, the bond can be rediscovered and rejuvenated.

Your story doesn't end here; it's just a chapter, and with effort and empathy, happier chapters await.

Editor's Note: Mindful Kenya offers mental health services on short USSD code *702*30#. By following the prompts a person seeking professional mental healthcare is linked with a specialist under guarantee of anonymity.

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