Pulse List 2016 12 ridiculous ways Nigerian police identify Yahoo Boys

Because our Nigerian police force cares so much about our reputation abroad, they are fighting the battle from the roots, on streets across Nigeria.

So they are either stopping you on the road, whether you are driving or trekking, or bursting into your room in the middle of the night.

This is how Nigerian policemen identify Yahoo Boys.

1. Bling-bling

It doesn’t matter that the gold chain is most likely not real gold. Nope. You must settle or reach station.

2. Laptop bag.

“Eyys. Come here. Is there laptop inside your bag? Where is the receipt? Are you carrying it around so you can quickly do the wire?”

3. You’re trekking with iPhone 6.

“Why are you walking on the road with an iPhone 6? Oho! so you have money to buy iPhone but you don’t have money to buy car?”

Naizwan. Oya, to the station.

4. Driving a Lexus when you’re not looking old.

“It isn’t your parent’s car, then where did you get money to buy it? And did anybody ask you whether you have a good job or not? Are the papers of the car even original or you downloaded it from the internet?”

When you explain to them, they’ll just be like,

5. Once they see an international number on your phone.

Why are you calling international number when you’ve not finished talking to people in Nigeria?

Whose business is it that it is your uncle that wants to send you small something? Is he even your uncle?

6. When they see a white woman on your phone.

Who is Celine Dion, is that the American woman sending you dollars?

7. When you dress too well.

“Why is your shirt standing like this? Is it pounds you used to iron it? Why are you this dressed in the morning and you don’t have office? Is your work on the road or on your laptop?”

And when you tell them that you like to dress well, they’ll be like,

8. When they see anything Western Union on your body.

“So you’ve been doing Yahoo to the extent that they’ve given you souvenir as regular customer abi?”

9. When they spot more than two guys in a car.

Make up your minds quickly. Are you a cultists or a Yahoo Boys? Choose wisely because you have to be one of them.

10. When your jersey has a suspicious name at the back.

“Did your father name you J Money?”

11. When you come out of a bank with a girl.

“Is that how you used to do? Enter bank, withdraw, and go and spoil the girl with money?”

12. Just be male.

“You dunno what Yahoo Yahoo means? Your mates that are doing it, do they have two heads? Lets go to the station.”

12 ridiculous ways Nigerian police identify Yahoo Boys

Nigeria has an international reputation for having more princes than actual thrones in the country.

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