Readers say they will recommend specialist help for a traumatized spouse

isaac dachen

September 29, 2016 10:55 AM

91% of Pulse Nigeria Poll voters say they will recommend a specialist to treat a spouse who has been making life miserable for them.

This worried woman needs advice

He has gone from a loving husband to an emotional abuser who takes delight in hurting his wife at every given opportunity. She is really confused and does not know what to do.

Read her story here:

"My name is Mirabel, a 36-year-old woman with three kids. I have been married for 10 years to Don and in the early stage of our marriage, he was just the perfect husband and father who never joked with his family.

He was ready to do anything to make me and the children happy. Though he was not making much from his job, he made sure he provided for our needs. He even managed to open a business for me and from the proceeds, I was also able to compliment what he provided.

But in the past two years, things have turned from good to worst as Don has suddenly become a strange man. I can't tell when the change started but it grew gradually and has become festered in out home, so much that I dread going home or even being in the company of my husband.

It started when he began being abusive, snapping at anything I did and talked me down at every given opportunity. Don insults me and remarks at every mistake I make. It is so bad that I am afraid of taking up any responsibility at home so that I would not make him angry.

In truth, he has not been physically abusive (which I would even prefer anyway), but the emotional abuse and trauma and I am going through is becoming unbearable. It has even gotten to a stage where he refuses to sleep with me and will only enjoy lovemaking when he forces himself on me, whether I am in the mood or not.

Anytime I try talking to him, he will flare up and leave the house and could stay away for two days before coming back.

I have spoken to some friends who say I should endure with him, especially as he has not been beating me but for how long will I continue with this kind of emotional torment?

Mirabel."

The teaser for the day was:

Would you prefer a spouse who abuses you emotionally or physically?

How Nigeria voted:

I can take emotional abuse but not physical abuse - 9%

I prefer physical abuse to emotional abuse - 7%

I will walk away in such a situation - 2%

I will advise him/her to see a specialist - 91%

So how would you vote on this?

isaac dachen