5 ways to cope with being called girl/boy in Lagos

yinka ogunlami

November 24, 2016 11:05 AM

If you always have to endure being taunted about your sexuality, this is a must read for you.

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“Woman wrapper, girl/boy every time you go they do like girl”.

This is something effeminate, if not gay, guys hear themselves being called on a daily basis.

In the classroom, at work, at church, everywhere; its something that is inevitable if you are effeminate and live in the society.

In fact my boss at my former place of work used to call me “Breasty” hoping that someday I would grow boobs due to my female-like disposition.

Let's face the fact; in this world there are boys, men that behave like women. It’s not something that can be denied.

It’s a phenomenon, and the rise of social media makes us see boys with female tendencies quite more commonly.

It’s not a mental disorder, not a sickness, or a demon possession but simply a matter of, let me say, genes and environmental adaptation.

How do you cope in a homophobic world where some people simply hate effeminate guys for being themselves.

Where you are constantly being called “Gay faggot”, where your sexuality is constantly the topic and bone of contention of every discussion.

My 5 tips below will help you cope and adapt to it.

Accept yourself first

Environment and society have constantly told you that you are sick, have a mental disorder, or you are demon possessed.

I tell you that’s a lie, you are sound and well. The first step is accepting yourself as wonderfully and beautifully made by God.

You have to come to terms with it, trust me I’ve tried to change, walked a little more boyishly, talked a little more manly, but all these efforts simply made me more weird and mysterious. Lol.

So I accepted what I could not change and this was the beginning of the journey.

Love yourself

After accepting yourself don’t sit down and start asking Jesus, Why? Why? Why?

Instead, love yourself, do not dwell in self pity, do not.

Develop thick skin

You cannot change the opinion of others towards you.

Everyone won’t like you.

Jesus was perfect, not everyone liked him even till now.

People are going to negatively tag you, taunt you and all, so you have to not let it get to you.

Be confident and walk with your head held high. The opinion that matters about you is your opinion so f*ck theirs.

Concentrate on your good qualities

Studies and with my own experience show that effeminate guys can be extremely creative, not only in the art but in tech, science, business and so on.

In fact, the current CEO of Apple Tim Cook is gay.

Concentrate on your strong points.

Know that your gender tendencies are not all there is to you. If you get this you won’t see yourself as beserk or mentally disturbed.

Live your life

You only live once, so live like it’s your last.

Stop being so self conscious, be free with yourself.

Be at ease, and live.

Surround yourself with people who love and adore you.

Stay away from hateful people.

You only have one chance to live, therefore live for now.

I hope with this few “crazy” points of mine I have been able to make your life a little better.

You are a treasure to this world so go out there and SLAY….Yasssss.

yinka ogunlami

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